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Imponderables

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Imponderables

Post  daved on 29/1/2009, 2:15 am

Ponder on these imponderables for a minute:-

1. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from
Holland called Holes?

3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

4. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

5. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

6. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

7. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

8. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist?

9. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

10. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

12. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

13. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

14. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?


15. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

16. No one ever says, "It's only a game" when their team is winning.

17. Ever wonder about those people who spend £2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE.


18. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhoea, does that mean that one enjoys it?

19. Why if you send something by road it is called a shipment, but when you send it by sea it is called cargo?

20. If a convenience store is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the door?
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Re: Imponderables

Post  Zedhead on 30/1/2009, 1:05 am

They are brill - especially "onety one" and the cheese one...

I've always wondered what erects the worlds tallest crane? and what you are supposed to do if you spill floor cleaner?
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Re: Imponderables

Post  Dark Knight on 30/1/2009, 1:09 am

onety one had me laughing .. brilliant!


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Re: Imponderables

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